


Romantic Booty Call

by stratataisen



Category: DCU, DCU (Comics)
Genre: Light-Hearted, M/M, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-11
Updated: 2015-07-11
Packaged: 2018-04-08 18:10:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 773
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4315185
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stratataisen/pseuds/stratataisen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bruce and Hal end up sort of stranded on a deserted planet... Also, despite the title, it not what you think. X3</p>
            </blockquote>





	Romantic Booty Call

**Author's Note:**

  * Translation into 中文 available: [浪漫一炮[Romantic Booty Call]](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8020702) by [Heline_Zhang](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Heline_Zhang/pseuds/Heline_Zhang), [stratataisen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stratataisen/pseuds/stratataisen)



> This is for fabula-unica, and it’s my first attempt at BatLantern. I hope you like it.
> 
> Also, despite the title, it is NOT nsfw.

Bruce pinched the bridge of his nose between his fingers. “So let me see if I understand this correctly…you kidnapped me-”

“-I’d like to think I heroically rescued you from boredom-”

“ _You kidnapped me_ from my office and dragged me off planet for a booty call-“

“-romantic getaway to an exotic planet-“

“- _a booty call_.” He repeated through clenched teeth. “And while on the way there your ex-lover-”

“- _mentor!_ _Ex-mentor!_ We never slept together I’ll have you know-”

“-ex-mentor decided to attack us while on the way to said booty call-“

“- _romantic getaway_ -“

“-and now we are now _stuck_ on a _deserted planet_ , you with a depowered ring, and me without my utility belt.”

Hal looked up at him from his spot on a fallen log.  He was in his civilian clothing, not looking the least bit phased about his ring being out of commission. “That sounds about right…well, all except for-”

“Except for _what_?” the billionaire asked in a sharp tone, he was not a happy camper.

“My ring isn’t completely depowered, I managed to get a distress call out to Kilowog before we crashed, so he’ll be here in a couple of hours,” Hal stood up and brushing away some dirt and twigs that got stuck to his pants. “…and you’re not without your utility belt.”

“ ** _What_**!?”

“Yeah, I stopped by the cave and asked Alfie to gather up your costume so I could put it in the rings pocket dimension, just in case.  I think I have just enough power to pull it out, hold on.” Hal lifted his ring hand and unfolding the pocket dimension, all of a sudden a large crate fell out with a thud. Hal grinned, “I figured if we stopped by Oa on the way home, you’d feel more comfortable in your costume than me dragging you around as Bruce Wayne.”

Bruce was on the verge of either hitting or hugging the man, he settled for pinching the bridge of his nose again. “Then why didn’t you give me the costume in the first place?”

“Because,” Hal said, his voice sultry and a sly grin painting across his lips.  He looked the man up and down with hooded eyes. “You look absolutely sexy in that suit and I wanted to have the pleasure of taking it off of you with my teeth.”

Bruce raised an eyebrow at that, frown increasing on his lips as he crossed his arms.

“Eh heh heh, it doesn’t look like he’s very happy with you, does he, poozer?” asked a loud baritone voice from above them. “You’re really in the…what’s that human word you always use?”

“Dog house! I’m in the dog house.  And thanks for stating the obvious big guy,” Hal snorted, crossing his arms and glaring up at the large alien. “I thought you said you’d be a few _hours_ not half an hour?”

“You welcome.” Kilowog gave him a toothy grin, he then looked over at Bruce and squinted, completely ignoring Hal’s question. “So you’re Jordan’s mate, huh?”

Bruce raised another eyebrow at that and glanced over at Hal, who was actually blushing and refusing to meet his eyes.  A small smirk graced his lips as he looked back of at the floating pink alien. “I am, most of the time.”

The two of them ignored Hal’s sudden spluttering and continued on, flawlessly, with their conversation.

“Hnn,” Kilowog eyed Bruce up and down with a critical look, a large grin spread across the alien’s face, “I should get you a badge of honor for being mated to the poozer.”

“ _Hey!_ ” Hal whined in protest, which went on deaf ears.

The corner of the billionaire’s lips twitched upward. “Hal’s not that bad, in fact, he has some rather good _features_ about him.”

“I bet! But I _don’t_ want to know about them! Ha ha ha!”  The pink alien let out a hearty laugh, floating down next to Bruce, giving him a sharp pat on his back.  “At the very least I’m going to get you a drink.  I think Gardner has something you humans can stomach.”

“If it’s coming from Gardner’s bar, then mostly likely not, but I’m always open for a challenge.” Bruce quipped, a smirk full on his lips.

“Hah! Jordan, I like this guy!”

“Oh god if you two become friends, end my life now.” Hal moaned, placing a hand over his eye as he leaned against the crate.  He was smiling though, despite his complaint.  He had been worried that his lover and one of his best Corps friends might not get along, but they seemed to be doing just fine.


End file.
